As human beings one of the closest relationships we are likely to have is with a partner. However, remaining happy in that relationship and staying together can be difficult through life’s challenges. Having a family can add pressure to the relationship and as the family grows and dynamics change, each others’ needs change and struggles can emerge.
It may feel easier at times not to confront problems but to try and resolve them within ourselves. This can feel confusing and overwhelming and can build resentment. If we do confront them with our partner we may find ourselves going around in circles, having the same old arguments with no real hope of resolving the underlying causes.
There are many issues which may bring you into couple therapy and below are just a few…
- poor communication – difficulties in expressing how we feel or what we need
- life changes ie birth of a baby, a bereavement, redundancy, retirement
- lack of trust
- betrayal or affair
- controlling behaviour
- different parenting styles
- different backgrounds, difficult cultures, different family experiences
- different goals and values
- family conflicts
how it works...
The initial or first couple therapy appointment will provide a space for you both to talk about how you are feeling and what you consider to be the difficulties or issues in your relationship with the support of a couple therapist - a counsellor or psychotherapist in a safe and non- judgemental environment.
You will hear how your partner also sees the difficulties and the therapist will pick up on particular things you both say and the ways in which you say them and may wish to explore them a little more. You will begin to understand yourself and your role in the relationship a little more as well as beginning to understand the role your partner takes on.
It may be necessary to think about your early life, your relationships with family and friends and your school experiences both in your early infancy and as a teenager as this will help to understand how early relationships developed and how they are influencing how you both make relationships now and how you deal with difficult feelings now, what your expectations are of your partner and of yourself and the different ways you both attempt to resolve relationship problems. You will begin to hear the impact you have on your partner and feel able to express the impact your partner has on you.
Toward the end of the session the therapist will talk to you about what you are hoping to gain from coming into couple therapy and to discuss possible constraints to this. It will then be suggested you both have a think about the session and make direct contact with the therapist if you both decide you would like to continue with the therapy.
Your initial or first couple therapy appointment is likely to last slightly longer than usual and could be from one hour to an hour and twenty minutes. This is important so that the therapist can gain a picture of your relationship and so that you both can get a sense as to how it could work for you both. All further appointments will be for 50 minutes.
other couple relationships...
Couple therapy is not limited to partners. It can also be helpful for any kind of couple relationship ie parent and grown up child or children or siblings where there are tensions or difficulties which cannot be resolved by the individuals.
If you are looking for couple therapy / counselling in Ipswich Suffolk, do contact us via email at [email protected] or call 01473 218541